Dear Jethro,

I really want to go to a Halloween party this year because I love dressing up. However, I’ve never been to a high school party before. Thanks to movies, I have a really bad impression of them. I want to go but I don’t want to be pressured into doing anything I don’t want to do. How can I have fun and fit in without going against my values?

-Conservative and Concerned

Dear Conservative and Concerned,

Your dilemma is something that a lot of high schoolers face, especially at public schools. They’ve grown up surrounded by certain values and beliefs, and then suddenly, they are thrown into an environment where they encounter many people who may have morals that conflict with their own. To answer your question, it is definitely possible to have fun without going against any of your beliefs. Here are a few suggestions:

1. Go to the party with friends that share the same values as you do

There is a saying that there’s strength in numbers, and it is very applicable to this situation. If you stick with your group, you can prevent each other from succumbing to peer pressure, and at the same time, you can still have fun.

2. Find another activity to do 

No matter what you do, there will be people at parties that are very different from you, and they may do things that conflict with your beliefs. This may include anything from drinking to excessive PDA, or worse. However, there are also many activities that you can do that you wouldn’t feel uneasy about. Is a movie playing? Find some friends and watch it with them! Is there music playing? Get your jam on!

3. Choose not to attend at all

Yes, it is disappointing, but if the high school party scene is too much for you, or you feel that you will fall to peer pressure, it is certainly an option to choose not to attend at all. You can still dress up for the occasion and go trick-or-treating, or throw your own get-together with your friends. You don’t have to go to a party to celebrate a holiday or have fun.

I hope my advice is useful, and I commend you for putting your values before anything else, and not letting your environment influence you. Whatever your decision, I wish you a Happy Halloween!

Sincerely,

Jethro